The Vienna-Haters

Once you train your eyes to see things you’re interested in, they just jump out at you.  If you like Toyota Priuses, you’ll notice them everywhere you go.  You might even distinguish between different years and models and stuff.  That might be why the covers of People and Us magazines are jumping out at me in the stores.  Jake and Vienna are still "big news," together with speculations of things already going wrong between them. 
This kind of "reality" is to some extent fabricated, but is taking on a life of its own for Jake.  And Vienna.  Here’s this guy, airline pilot, he’s already scrambled, but I’m thinking he knows what he likes, and he knows what he wants to have at home.  Vienna fits his picture.  And this seems to be really annoying to some people.
Even without Disney/ABC, life for Jake/Vienna is complicated and expensive.  They have to work out their details so they can live happily ever after, since that seems to be where they are going.  Any disagreements promulgated in the tabloids may have no basis in fact, but there they are.  I had to ask why.  Why can’t people just let them get on with wherever they are going?  There’s some deeply-rooted cultural stuff that makes people just gag over Jake’s choice. 
Relationship-science.  Who should Jake have chosen if not Vienna?  One of my early favorites was Ashleigh 25 account manager from North Potomac, Maryland.  And y’all remember that episode where Jake sent Ella, Kathryn, Jessie, AND ASHLEIGH home.  That was a real move on Jake’s part, I thought.  He just cleaned out the barn.  Why did he do that?  He only had to send two home, and he sent FOUR home.  But why Ashleigh?  I mean, she seemed so qualified.  And of the four, she was the one who left in tears that night, very upset, particularly because Vienna was staying.  So what’s up with that?
It turns out… Ashleigh works in Washington, D. C. for some kind of human resources managing house, I don’t exactly get that.  Ashleigh was first-runner-up in the 2008 Miss Maryland USA pageant.  Then she was THIRD runner-up in the 2009 Miss Maryland USA pageant, as if, she’s over the hill at 25?  How horrible.  Ashleigh is big on clothes, which is a nice hobby if you choose to afford it, and seems to be comfortable discussing fashion design.  Ers.  Stores.  Shopping.  Shoes.  I’m at a loss here.  Ashleigh has a Facebook and a Twitter.  The girls made friends with each other while they were all trashing Vienna.  Ashleigh’s Twitter says she’s going to New York to visit Gia (26 swimsuit model).  So you might be seeing a pattern here.
They are city folk.  And you have to wonder, did Jake get that?  Did Jake strike a blow for the rest of us, who couldn’t possibly handle someone who might easily decide she’s out of his league?  Someone who seems to be very concerned with status, and having 24 pairs of the same kind of shoes?  Someone who could, without much effort, put Jake in her closet and rank him in some order with everything else that’s going on in her life that she thinks is so gosh-darn important?
It’ll make your head spin.  No wonder he liked Vienna.  And no wonder the rest of these fashion-conscious highly-evolved city folk don’t like Vienna.  Well there’s still more to the story but you know, I have things to do. 

About comdude

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